Friday, August 28, 2015

Where's the comma?

Angry man into his cell phone:

Who do you think I am? Anthony Stupid?

So who the hell is Anthony Stupid?

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Emergency notification absurdity

I should've taken a picture.

Engraved onto the push bar of the glass doors it said "for use in an emergency pull."

So does that mean I can push when it's not an emergency?"

Monday, July 27, 2015

I'm working on it but it's not done yet

Working title for a new laugh riot:

Ron Konkoma meets Brewster North for a drink at the East Side Access Bar.

It's all in jokes for the outbound commuter.

Of course nowadays half of them are looking at their electronic devices and the other half are asleep.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Dogs and signs at rest stops on the Interstates

Saw a sign at a rest stop on an Interstate in Connecticut this weekend:

"Please no dogs inside"

As if I want to please, or pleasure a dog inside or outside.

This reminded me of one I saw on I-95 south of Bangor, ME:

"No smoking dogs allowed"

Actually, it was laid out thusly:


So, are non-smoking dogs allowed?

Thursday, December 13, 2012

A thought on mortality and life

Life is too short to waste it drinking bad beer, bad wine or bad whiskey. But spending time with bad women . . . ?

Friday, November 2, 2012

Tea Party Atheists

You know how they say there's no atheists in a foxhole? Well, there are no tea party republicans in office during a disaster - except for the ones whose heads are so far up their asses that they've forgotten what being human and humane is about.

Romney screwed by hurricane Sandy?

When it came to Hurricane Sandy and its aftermath, Romney must be cursing up a storm. I can hear it now.

"Why the ding dang dong did a storm like this have to happen a week before the election. There's not a fling flang fling thing I can do to look good, because I can't do a hing hang hong thing about it. I donate a bus full of canned goods and they tell me that nobody's electric can opener works. How were we supposed to think of that?"

"All I can do is hope Obama pulls a George W. Bush."

Obama might not be the greatest leader in the history of the world, but he isn't stupid enough to pull a George W. Bush. Hell, even George Bush isn't stupid enough to pull off another George W. Bush.

As for Mr. Romney, the best he can come up with is to cut the national government out of the disaster relief chain and leave it to the states, and those who want to donate a few unnecessary cans of food to the cause when what's needed is hard, cold cash.